The Meeting of the FOFU


A mutiny has begun in our community. Don’t worry. I don’t live in Quartzsite. It’s not at that level. Recently a secret group called FOFU (Flying Old Farts United) started meeting to air their grievances about Community leaders, past, present, and future. This spilled over to anyone who had ever been within eyesight of one of the Country Clubbers and may have accidentally smiled in their direction. They even yelled at one of their own for things he might do in the future if he ever became one of Them.

Their first meeting took place in the middle of a busy intersection. After causing a traffic jam, two fender benders, and police intervention, they decided they would move their secret group to the corner bar. Signs were posted up everywhere. We even got little reminder notices on our front doors.

For some reason, they were still surprised when half the community showed up. The other half complained about 8 pm being too late to go out and asked for updates on how the meeting went.

It didn’t go as expected.. Barney, who missed his calling as a bard in a former life, pulled out his book of sonnets and would read them dramatically, according to the theme of the discussion. My brother, Jack, became irate anytime someone bellowed into his ear, “Help us, Jack! You’re our only hope.” Chuck, the bouncer, gave a moving speech about how inspired he was that hippies had enough brain cells to remember what they were protesting, since the rest of us still can’t figure it out.

By midnight, most of the Old Farts were passed out and the meeting wasn’t nearly as much fun as we thought it would be. We decided to take the rest of the party– I mean meeting – to Jack’s house. He even promised not to kick me out, if I would stop stealing danishes from his cupboard and strapping them to my head.

I don’t think I’ll be going to the next meeting. I waited all night and not one of those Old Farts has ever flown. Although, one did make good distance when Chuck kicked him out of the bar.

Tomorrow, we’ll talking about the hazards of smoking hot dogs.

Published in: on August 2, 2011 at 7:15 pm  Leave a Comment  
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